Other Ironies of the Modern Age

There's a well-known saying that is included in at least one country hit song. "Everyone wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die to get there." At first blush, that sounds kind of corny and "country" but think about it. When I start think about the ironies of the modern age in the 21st century, a number of things come to mind. It will be my intention in this blog to address only a few of those.

Many people, especially younger people, want to be successful, live the dream life with a house, two cars, children and enough money in the bank to go anywhere they want whenever they want. For many, however, there seems to be a problem with that. Not all of those individuals want to exert the energy or put forth the effort to achieve their dreams.

If we examine just one part of that dream, we will begin to understand. First of all, relationships take real work and effort. It doesn't matter whether it is a friendship, a dating relationship, a committed partnership or a marriage. All of them take work. Unless, you or I are willing to make a daily effort to maintaining and strengthening our relationships, they are going to falter and eventually may fail completely. Isn't it ironic that those who claim that they want a relationship the most are unwilling to take the necessary steps to create and maintain what they most desire?

Stepping away from the American dream for a moment, or maybe not really, consider the corporate workforce. If I could only tell you the number of times employees told me how much they disliked their working environment or position, yet these same individuals were unwilling to step up to the plate and face their challenges. Or consider those who will conveniently make themselves look better at the expense of someone else who, in reality, may be "breaking their back" to improve the working situation for all. Isn't it ironic that those who complain the loudest are unwilling to put forth the effort to change things?

Many of us have probably heard the stories or the modern day parable of the man who as teenager thinks his parents know little or nothing about life. Then, at age eighteen, he is determined to show everyone "how life should be lived". During his twenties, he begins to realize that his parents may have been right about a few things. By the time he reaches his thirties, he may even begin to ask his parents to advice or guidance now and then. Surely by the time, he finds himself in his forties, he realizes that his parents really did know what they were talking about "way back when".

For me, it is ironic that generations that should have great advantages, aspirations and hopes seem less than enthusiastic about stepping up to the plate and assuming their responsibilities in society. I have often seen an "in it for the glory" mentality among the generation age sixteen through thirty. There is a willingness to participate or perform "as long as I am going to be noticed" for what I am doing. If the task at hand involves menial labor or getting dirty without any glory, then there is less likelihood to step up, express interest or a willingness to get involved. One might call this a "selective work ethic"!

All of us have choices to make, paths to follow, dreams to catch and goals we have set to achieve. The reality of life is that we don't always make the right choices, we do not always follow the right paths, we may not catch our dreams, and our goals may not be achieved in time frame we set for them. Such is life. Isn't it ironic?

~ DB Turnmire

A Manic Monday Parable

Even though I am still out of the mainstream workaday world, I can honestly say that today was a bit of a manic Monday. I can add that the landscaping, shrubbery and rock beds around our house look better than they have in three springs since we moved into the house. Of course, to accomplish this, Alan (my younger son) and I worked for about five and a half hours straight non-stop. Pruning, trimming, raking, leaf vacuuming, bagging and chopping - all of which have taken their toll on aching muscles and an aging back. The end results, however, make it worth the pain and toil.

During our manic Monday yard work session, five shrubs are now completely gone and a couple dozen others are pruned and trimmed. By the end of the day, with the yard waste bin full and bags of leaves still sitting around from last fall, a couple of bushes escaped the trimmers or ax today. They are left for another day. One of them is a lilac bush which appears nearly dead, has sprouted very few leaves for the past two years and even fewer flowers.

The lilac bush in our backyard reminds me of Jesus' parable in the gospel according to Luke, chapter 13. A man had a fig tree in his yard and for three years he came looking for fruit on the tree. Every year, it produced the same result - no fruit! The owner of the fig tree then told the gardener who was taking care of his vineyard and trees to cut it down. In fact, the tree had been using up the soil and precious water without producing any fruit. This owner had given it a chance and it failed to produce.

Many of my former students and parishioners will remember hearing the definition of a parable as "an earthly story with a heavenly meaning". Unfortunately, some of my gay and non-gay readers will dismiss that definition and choose to think of this parable as a "nice story." However, the message of the parable relates to all of us, whether we are believers or not. Don't we all have something in our lives that takes up space, uses our resources and gets in the way of allowing us to be absolutely as productive as possible? You may or may not be like Bill and me with a tree in your backyard that hasn't brought forth fruit (or flowers in our case).

If I were leading a brainstorming session, we might come up with at least a starter list of things which prevent us from being as productive and successful as God intends us to be. Just to name a few we could include anger, frustration, resentments, bitterness, guilt, unhappiness, jealousy, fear, disappointment, pain and depression. As long as any of these feelings or states of mind is present in our lives, they have the ability at any given time to rise up and control the course of our thoughts and actions. Most of us are aware of the pious platitude to "Let go and let God." It sounds nice and easy but in reality is most often easier said than done.

There is no pigeon holing groups of people affected by these types of driving emotions. No casting off the curse to gay or straight people, rich or poor, educated or uneducated, or any specific ethnic group for that matter. Every one of us has to make a daily decision whether or not to allow one of these emotional states to detour the course of life. If not, I would encourage you to consider "laying the axe" so to speak to that which is preventing you from being the most productive individual possible. What kind of tree do you want to be? One that is vibrant, lively, full of life and productive? Or one that is stagnant, just existing and taking up resources with nothing to show for it?

~ DB Turnmire